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Archive for the ‘Marriage’ CategoryLast night my friend John brought home his beautiful new wife home from Thailand. They’re going to live here, well, Yokohama actually. WOW. He quit his jobs and is getting ready to start a new career and a new wife in a new city. And I thought MY rollercoaster was interesting. But I have to say, they looked like they are in bliss. Yesterday was his wife’s first day in Japan. Chris decided to show her the special local delicacies like Akashiyakidoufu with a face made out of ginger and green onion. How about some sansho on your salad or maybe you would like to taste this green stuff in your tea (wasabi). Just kidding we only played one or two litttle tiny jokes. I don’t know if she liked the food or not because it was a bit difficult communicating. I had never spoken to a native Thai before so I didn’t know what to expect for an accent–pretty tough. I guess John has developed an ear ’cause most of the time I couldn’t catch what she was sayin’ until she repeated it three or four times and pointed. For now I think his life is going to be more interesting than mine, so stay tuned. Hey Wadman, write a comment. The peak I had to wait three days until she called; must be an international girl thing. We went to a blues festival the next weekend. She was a bit shy, but I kept asking her questions about Japan and getting answers out of her. I was so curious about Japan. When we started talking about food, welp, I knew something was good. I had reached the top of the first hill of the the rollercoaster. So we talked and had a few beers–hehe..and then it was time to make the first move. I asked her if she wanted to go to church with me on Sunday. hahahahahahahahahaha�.NO WAY! I dive bombed for a kiss and she matrixed me. Fling. Being the nice guy I am, uhum uhum, I decided to wait until the moment was right. So I bellied up to the bar and asked for a couple a big ones. She took to it right well and before you know it, she was eatin’ right out of my hands..french fries they were. I put on every James Bond pick up technique I had. I did the big blue-eyed-mouth-swipin’-tilt-the-sunglasses-swaggering-come-on-baby-let-the-good-times-roll move on so she had no chance to say no to my kiss. But it didn’t work. I bombed out on the second date. A glitch. Maybe I should give up. I try to understand the reasons for our indifferences and I try to explain how we think different ways, but it always comes back to me. I ask what I can do to help the situation but never hear a clear answer, or any answer for that matter. Maybe I’m wrong, but at least I want to hear what she thinks and what I should do to better the situation. NO WAY!. Bad idea. DANGER DANGER! I’m a teacher and I’m married to a Japanese kansaijin (a person from the kansai region; commonly known for their more outgoing personalities Living here and being married to a Japanese has given me the opportunity to delve deeper into understanding the differences between the western and asian, particularly Japanese, mindset. Just today, the wife and I were talking about our ways of telling each other our needs. I said she needed to tell me what she wanted since reading her mind is, well, impossible. I know I know, that’s a typical male / female problem residing in the inherent inability for the male species to recognize that the opposite sex is more interested in “what should be done” rather than “this is how we are going to do it”. But I think there is just a little more involved here in Japan. Read the rest of this entry » I should know by now. Keep my mouth shout. But I have to say something. My wife argues with me because I argue with her. I shouldn’t have said anything in the first place. This way of arguing has to be something Japanese. I must not be understanding it. Isn’t it true in Japan that if you are angered or disappointed by someone that silence is worth a thousand words. Of course, I think that Japanese are born with a special “Japanese only” radar system hooked up to a mainframe which sends signals to all other Japanese. This provides the means of communication of which I am not privilaged enough to partake. It absolutely makes sense that Japanese understand each other as much as they do beingst that they live on a secluded island. Understood. This is just making it harder for the rest of the world to step inside their bubble. Yes, we can step inside it, walk around it, work in it, play in it, but can we become Japanese. I don’t believe this so difficult to do in other westernized countries. I don’t think keeping your mouth shut allows for the creative expression so needed by humans in order to learn what is right, wrong, accepted, radical, racist, honest, sincere or sarcastic. |
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). As a teacher, it’s sometimes…I take that back…usually difficult to ask my wife questions related to speaking or writing Japanese. I know she means well, but we just have opposite ways of going about the same answer. She believes the sensei is a lecturer and the student is a listener who needs to know the process for coming to a particular conclusion. My ‘conclusion’ today was the difference between ‘gatsu’ and ‘getsu’. 
it was still good 
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